Play by somebody's (own) rules verb
To get her approval, you will have to play by her rules.
I decided to play by my own rules and not to let anyone tell me what to do anymore.
To have someone completely under your control
To find ways of avoiding or breaking the rules, either those of life in general or of a specific structure or organization, in order to achieve your aim
A guy of integrity, respect, and adherence to the law.
Starting of this idiom is a verb, so it needs conjugation.
If you want to stop quarrels, try playing by the other's rules then.
Jane played by her own rule in that project and failed because no one supported her.